Little and womanly

To You, My dear Caroline Leigh Gabriel Bass

Some people say friends are like flowers. I'd like to disagree. A friend is someone you trample flowers with while trying to get out of a window at 2 o'clock in the morning.

A friend is someone that comes over at 11:45 pm and plays 1980s Outburst to avoid an awkward situation.

A friend is someone who calls your parents by their first names and isn't afraid to make fun of them.

A friend is someone that knows that Peg doesn't care if you had a rough night, the shower hooks are 50 dollars.

A friend is someone who knows why Janice's purse looks just like Lila's.

A friend is someone who calls you at 6 o'clock and tells you a bottle of Tequila has to be on her porch by 9 or you are both going to jail.

A friend is someone that gives you a cats pillow to sleep on even though she knows you are deathly allergic to cats.

A friend is someone that cleans your bathroom with you every Friday, so you can go to the football games.

A friend is someone that makes you clean her room, so she can go out.

A friend is someone that is almost as useless as a tree while playing beer pong.

A friend is someone that comes to a family birthday party, your whole family hugs and takes pictures with, and then she knocks a full plate of food on the floor and blames it on your cousin.

A friend is someone you don't talk to for 4 months and one random day comes over, you both cry and things go back to the way they were 4 months ago.

A friend is someone that is mature.

A friend is someone that understands what "Poor dear old Aunt Ethel" and "You need to be careful who you hang out with. Last night the Mexicans came in here" really mean.

A friend is someone that will strip down to bras and underwear and swim in the ocean in the wee hours of the morning when the water is -20 degrees.

A friend is someone that calls the Stop and Go lady and asks if she can pretend to be your mom.

A friend is someone that you wake up next to in your mom's bed, Greg on the other side of you, and Adam on the floor with no shorts on.

A friend is someone that lets you tell your dad you are at their house and when he calls the whole family plays along and pretends like you are there when clearly you are at your boyfriends house.

A friend is someone that dyes your hair the color of a penny.

A friend is someone that perms your hair and makes you resemble a poodle.

A friend is someone you can pee your pants with just having an AIM conversation about Frank and Shelia.

A friend is someone you have prank wars with.

A friend is some that understands when "Two, big, black men" are in the front seat and won't make eye contact with her that it's OK to leave. "They won't hurt me."

A friend is someone that gives you pickle wine.

A friend is someone that knows "Not to give him chocolate."

A friend is someone that knows what has been a rule for like 10 years.

A friend is someone that can get you ungrounded with 3 words: Come on Bran.

A friend is someone that "Can be your friend."

A friend is someone that lets you go to the Authorized personnel only Room.

A friend is someone that hates your favorite green silk skirt and the grandma earrings that go with it.

A friend is someone you take fake "senior pictures" and real senior pictures with.

A friend is someone you throw work fliers away with.

A friend is someone that knows DavidDavideati.

A friend is someone that doesn't like Rob.

A friend is someone that drives to taco bell at 3:56 and buys 15 dollars worth of food, on your credit card.

A friend is someone who drives with your through snow drifts and lives to tell the story.

A friend is someone that helps you get the backpack untangled from your foot.

A friend is someone you call when your house is haunted.

A friend is someone that sits outside with you during commons with Mason.

A friend is someone that Bostater doesn't let you sit next to.

But most of all, A friend is someone that knows the only person that can help us is Rob P.

If your flowers can do all those things, then I guess friends are like flowers after all.

Cheers you're my best friend.